We all know the damaging short and long term effects bullying can have on a child, but do you know how to spot possible warning signs that your child may be being bullied?
Professor Donna Cross from The Kids Research Institute Australia is the chief researcher behind ‘Friendly Schools’ - a set of resources and tools for schools and families developed following 20 years of comprehensive research in Australian schools involving over 30, 000 children.
Professor Cross says parents hope their child will tell them as soon as there is a relationship problem with their peers but unfortunately, this doesn’t always happen.
“More than half of all children who are bullied do not tell anyone. This may be because the child feels embarrassed or ashamed, or confused, or they may even feel it is their own fault, or they are worried about how their parents will react,” Professor Cross says. “But it is never a child’s fault for being bullied and we must do all we can to help identify when our children may be experiencing bullying.”
Professor Cross says there are signs parents can look for. If your child is being bullied, they may start to avoid the following:
- The person or people who are bullying them
- Using their phone or other devices when they once enjoyed using both
- Friends with whom they previously spent time with
- Going to school
Some warning signs that might indicate that your child is being bullied include:
- Appearing generally unhappy, miserable, moody or irritable
- Losing or having damaged possessions
- Putting him or herself down
- Saying they have, or seeming to have, no friends to share their free time with
- Having difficulty sleeping or having nightmares
- Withdrawing from activities and being reluctant to say why
- Frequent complaints of headaches or stomach aches
- Lowered school performance
Professor Cross says many children may show these behaviours at times, especially during adolescence, but some of these taken together may be a sign of being bullied.
“Because children are sometimes reluctant to communicate that they have been bullied, it is important that parents think about how best to approach their child when they suspect bullying has occurred,” Professor Cross says. “Try to find a ‘teachable’ moment, such as something similar that has occurred in the media your family shares or on the news.”
